#RelationshipGoals

As I scroll through my Twitter feed, I cannot help but notice the many hashtags I deem unnecessary as I pass it multiple times in one minute. However, a hashtag that has caught my eye over the past few months struck me tonight as one that should be no more. #RelationshipGoals can be looked up on twitter to reveal pictures of expensive shoes, rings, concert tickets, even scenes from completely fictional movies. People are posting these expectations of fictional relationships on their own lives and to me, it is honestly somewhat sad.

While some are joking around when they post these things, others are hinting to significant others that they actually expect these dreams to come true. It makes me wonder...is this what love has come to? A standard of purchases and gifts you hold your boyfriend or girlfriend to? And using a hashtag of all things to communicate it?

Call me crazy...call me judgemental, but love is not something I take lightly. In my own relationship, I set goals too. But they are much different than those I come across by my classmates on social media. My 18-month relationship that began my junior year in high school (and only continues to get stronger with each passing day) is so happy on both ends because we set these goals:
(Take my advice or scoff at it, but just know you're reading my blog and I'm entitled to my opinions just as you are)

1) At the beginning, I made sure he believed in the God I did, it's the most important thing to me and the reason the two of us are even here on earth today.

2) Pray together. We go to church together on occasion but knowing we simply pray over the same things or asking each other to pray for our families not only brings us closer to each other, but it brings us closer to each other's families.

3) Openly talk about our opinions on controversial topics. No 2 people will agree on absolutely every little detail. It's impossible. It's what makes us all different. But if we know where each other stands on things and we UNDERSTAND WHY, it will be a whole lot easier to communicate.

4) Praise each other. When I feel a sense of pride in my boyfriend for accomplishing something such as getting that job or graduating high school, I let him know.

5) Let Go and Let God. I know, this sounds cliche because EVERYONE says it but it is 100% true. Going to seperate schools next year where we won't get to see each other everyday is tough but if we spend less time thinking about the bad possibilities and more time gaining more trust in each other and God, things will always work out for the better.

Never once have I expected my boyfriend to buy me things, take me out to expensive dinners or spoil me. Does he do it? Yes. I am blessed to have someone as thoughtful of him. However, it is not a goal of mine to get him so obsessed with me that he just wants to do whatever I want him to and buy me whatever I want. I want to live our relationship through the word and grow our love into something God would be proud to sign his name to and something we can cherish whether we end up together or not.

I'm not judging anyone by any means, but I do think it;'s time the word "love" stops being thrown around like a gym towel and instead, placed upon on of the highest priorities in our lives. God made you wonderfully and beautifully and he will give you a relationship when he believes you are ready.

Talking to my best friend about this issue tonight she said "It's about the emotional aspects, not just the physical and I think that's what this generation misses."

Don't hold others to a fairytale they can't afford, hold them to a level of respect and love they can't refuse.

For Give

Believe it or not, we're not here on earth just because our parents had us. We're not here to live for other people or things. We're here to serve God and do his work on earth as it's done in heaven. We are taught every day of our lives to give and anyone who has read a single snippet of a bible story knows that it's not just a human thing...It's a God thing. He put us here to help and give to those who cannot help themselves, or even those who can.

I think one thing that stumps a lot of people about this is that humans are mean! Hello! Bullying is not just for high school, folks! People have a tendency to truly upset one another and a lot of people say they don't need people in their life who hurt them. So what do you do when you've shunned an important friend or family member out of your life? I've often wondered the same...

Why would someone go on treating a bad situation like it  has ruined their life? Why do people let things ruin their lives? I have never understood this. You control your destiny (along with the Big Man upstairs.) Well, when someone does you wrong, have you ever thought of forgiving them?

But Shelby they did the unforgiveable act!

I'm not sure an unforgivable act exists. Not in God's world it doesn't seem like. I want to look at at Matthew 18:21-35 (read the whole story I promise it's better in context.)

Peter asks Jesus how many times a person is forgiven...seven, maybe? Jesus replies that a person shall be forgived 70 times 7 times. Jesus tells a symbolic story (as he does often in Matthew which to me is WAY COOL!). This story is about a servant who owed a king millions of dollars. The king ordered the servant and his family be sold but after a lot of begging, the king forgived the servant's debt and set him free. The servant then went to someone who owed him debt and never forgave the debt. God punished him for this.

I think this says a lot. God has forgiven us, and since we should be striving to be more like him, forgiveness is something we must take seriously. It is so hard to forgive someone just like it was so hard to walk away from people bullying you. But no one ever said life would be easy or fair or just. But one thing is for sure: God's love for you is easy to accept, it's fair and just and so many things.

Doing what He asks, especially something as simple as forgiving someone else, will not only please God, it will please you. I have recently been working on forgiveness of others and I am not sure that I have ever been happier. It is truly enlightening to treat every person and situation with a fresh, new outlook. God deserves it and so do you and the person you are forgiving.

I challenge you to think of something or someone you have not forgiven, and let them know this weekend that you forgive them. And truly do it! Let go of the hurt and pain built up by the situation...give it to God and be FREE.

Have a blessed week and thanks for reading. God Bless.